Make me.......don't break me!
When it rains (and thunders) on your parade, you start to get
the feeling that life, the universe, God, fate have singled you out for an
abnormally large dose of trials. In
fact, there are more than a few days, when I start to believe that life is
nothing but a trial and I’m doing a sentence even though no verdict has been
Innocent until proven guilty just doesn’t cut it in our
spiritual life. We are guilty but we have no recollection of the crime and so
we’re doing time. The picture perfect lifestyle that’s sold to us on TV and in
magazines is apparently not yours or mine……..nothing is constant least of
all…peace. Our homes and jobs are
organised but inside of us we’re a mess.
We love others but we don’t love ourselves. Mostly because we
don’t know what love is though we have plenty of experience of what love is
not. Love is not damaging yourself with harmful thoughts like: “why can’t he
love me when I’m so lovable?”. Love is not hoping against hope that he’ll
change. Love is not crying into your glass of wine every night. Love is not
having a tantrum and taking pleasure in another’s strife.
But most people, the unwoken, will live their lives with that
belief system and draw the hapless bystander into this web of falsehood. We get
caught and trapped in the rigidities and oddities of this sinister cult.
Trouble is, the followers of this cult are none other than our family and
friends, each with their own private mantra…….I will obey…..the TV, the minister,
colleague, friend and the foe (who has a remarkable resemblance to a friend!).
Life is challenging, no doubt about it. But we have added
free will into the pot of destiny and mixed it with vigour until it seems as if
the gods wear a permanent frown when our name comes up. In to each life the sun
has to shine but why does to have to be a heatwave? Is it our undeveloped minds
that reacts so negatively?
An easy life and fortunate life is not what I seek. I am
seeking the meaning in misfortune. I’m led to believe that adversity is a
teacher or even a potter that fashions a lump of clay into an elegant vase.
Yes, I’m learning and I want to but could tribulation not teach me something
I don’t want to swing on my hammock when there’s a field to
be ploughed. I don’t want to be comfortable when others struggle. I don’t want
to exist in the world of one – me. I want to improve and better myself. I want
to be made into something worthwhile. I want to believe that peace and harmony
exists though it may be in short supply at the moment.
I have developed resilience but when do I rest? An
indomitable spirit never gets tired but flesh and bones do. We’re tired of the
seeing and doing. We want to rest our senses as much as our heads. An onslaught
of to do’s and eking out an existence takes its toll.
We forget that we are greater than our challenges. We have a
reserve of untapped potential and sometimes it’s never tapped if we end up
broken by life and our fellow man. Mind strengthening exercises come in the
form of saying “no” when weak reflexes want to say “yes”. Leaving our cares
behind is a good thing so that we can run barefoot in tall grasses.
I’m tired of the trials yet I want to be refined. I want to
be an urn of knowledge and not an empty
vessel. It takes effort, it takes sweat, it takes back breaking persistence to
just keep on keeping on.
I know I can…and I will and I must. I want to be a newer and
improved version of myself. I have more to give so I need to stretch and be
wrung dry in the mangle of life. I want to be polished into something of
substance and share my sparkles of wit and wisdom.
Failures can turn into pillars of success and I’ve tasted more
of the latter than the former. We all want a break, a chink of light through
the dark clouds. If I break into little pieces, then I have found through
strength of character, then I can put the puzzle together in the right order.
When I make mistakes, I must learn to think in a new way. Every problem has a
solution and, in finding it, I want it to be the making of me.
Labels: World view